How Much Do I Care?
How Much Do I Care
By: Christopher H. McKinney Sr.
In today’s hyper competitive labor market, leaders must seek every competitive advantage possible to attract and retain the best talent. Even once an employee is onboarded, we must remain vigilant as other companies will continue to entice the top talent to join their team. I have worked with several organizations that have had employees leave after six months due to being offered better incentives and pay but I suspect that it was not solely about pay. Now, we cannot always outcompete higher wages, but we can hold our own when we ensure people know that we genuinely care.
Roger L. Martin in his Harvard Business Review article titled “The Real Secret to Retaining Talent” provides examples of the negative impact of when people do not feel we care. It articulates how caring for our people can make a significant positive difference. What I have come to know over my career is when you pay a fair wage, have a positive culture and your people know you care, folks will think twice before they jump ship.
At a conference I heard leadership expert, John Maxwell say, “People don’t care how much you know until they know how much you care.” Former U.S. Secretary of State Collin Powell said it this way, “People don't give two cents about what we think we know or who we think we are if they perceive we don't care about them (perception is their reality).” I can attest personally from my own experience and from my own observations that it makes a significant difference when people know how much you care about them as an individual.
So, what does caring for your people mean? Let’s start with what it does not mean. It does not mean being their bestie or BFF. It does not mean walking past an opportunity to correct incompatible behavior or holding them accountable. It does not mean inviting them over to your house routinely or hanging out with them afterhours. It does not mean downplaying the truth to avoid hurting their feelings. It does not mean showing them favoritism.
Caring for your people begins with making a genuine connection with those we have been given responsibility to lead. The stewardship of those individuals in our organizations is the #1 task we have as leaders. Our people are the #1 resources in our organizations. It is not the product or the fancy equipment. It is the people. So, how can we show them that we genuinely care?
We show our staff we care when we get to know them on a personal level. First and foremost, knowing first names is a great place to start, but beyond learning their name, learn at least one fact about the person that you can follow up on in future conversations. This is a great next step. Do they have a kid? Do they have a significant other? Do they have a favorite hobby? I have witnessed time and time again that the #1 topic of almost every person on the earth is themselves. Ask questions about them and you will learn a great deal about the individual. If you do nothing else but ask questions, listen, and retain information you will change the relationship for the better.
Next, push past the standard "I'm fine" response. We are all moving so fast from task to task that our conversations can become a formality. This shows up when I pass a person in the hallway, I ask, “How are you?” and I am not really looking for a response as I continue to walk down the hall and move on to my next thought. This often leads to the standard reply, “I’m fine.” I encourage you to take time to stop and push past the standard reply. Try stopping for two minutes and fully engaging the person, by saying, “No. I really want to know how you are doing?” If you look them in the eyes with a sincere look, they will likely open up, and 120 seconds is more than enough time to have a sincere connection. In the Harvard Business Review article “Why People Follow the Leader: The Power of Transference” Michael Maccoby posits that when employees relate to their boss in a way that reminds them of a past relationship, they transfer those feelings to the boss. So, when we engage people in a way that makes them feel genuinely cared for, they connect with us on a deeper level.
To be competitive and move our organizations forward, as leaders we must show genuine care and concern with our staff. The more genuine connections there are at multiple levels in the organization, the more “sticky” the organization becomes. Stickiness refers to employees remaining with the organization. People will follow us to the end of the earth when they know we care. Make time to get away from your desk to engage. Take time to listen to their stories. Take time to get to know them. Take time for touch leadership. Leadership is caught not taught.
